The Golden Weed God

Born in an age when mortals first discovered the sacred herb, a humble farmer named Ezra became so profoundly attuned to its mystical properties that he transcended the material plane entirely, his consciousness expanding across infinite dimensions until he achieved godhood through pure, unyielding euphoria. As his physical form warped and evolved, his head swelled to impossible proportions—a vessel barely containing the cosmic knowledge and divine enlightenment flooding his being—while rose-tinted lenses materialized before his eyes, forever filtering reality through a lens of golden serenity. The universe itself seemed to acknowledge his ascension, crafting a halo of contentment that orbited his skull as he wandered through the void between worlds, sustained by an endless supply of burning blunts and terrestrial snacks that materialized at his whim. Freed from the constraints of mortality, The Golden Weed God developed an unpredictable benevolence, occasionally summoning lucky mortals to share in his cosmic experience, elevating those deemed worthy to champions blessed with fragments of his reality-bending power and the promise of eternal youth. His philosophy became law across dimensions: the pursuit of higher consciousness knows no limits, and generosity flows most freely when the spirit is most liberated. Now he drifts through the cosmos between mountain peaks and celestial clouds, a living paradox of divine majesty and chaotic mischief, forever seeking new souls to enlighten and new flavor combinations to satisfy his ever-growing munchies.

Strength

20, modifier +5

Dexterity

18, modifier +4

Constitution

30, modifier +10

Intelligence

30, modifier +10

Wisdom

25, modifier +7

Charisma

30, modifier +10

Blunt of Enlightenment

The Golden Weed God exhales a cloud of smoke. All creatures in a 30 ft. radius must succeed on a DC 20 Wisdom saving throw or be charmed for 1 minute.

Cosmic Snack Feast

Conjures a feast of snacks. Allies within 60 ft. regain 4d10 hit points and gain advantage on their next attack roll.

Resize

The Golden Weed God can resize himself to any size from Tiny to Gargantuan as a bonus action, altering his reach and area of effect.

Divine Champion Selection

As an action, he can select one creature within 60 ft. to become a champion, granting them a magical blunt that allows them to cast one spell of their choice once per day.

Euphoric Wave

Releases a wave of euphoric energy in a 60 ft. cone. Creatures must make a DC 20 Constitution saving throw or be incapacitated for 1 round.

Divine Euphoria

The Golden Weed God is always under the effects of the spell 'Calm Emotions'.

Cosmic Snack Conjurer

Can conjure any snack or cannabis strain three times per day.

strength

+12

dexterity

+11

constitution

+18

intelligence

+18

wisdom

+15

charisma

+18

Psychic

Poison